Adventures at Disney

The following story takes place at Disneyland during the weekend of a half marathon, but in a parallel universe.  It's a universe where almost everything is the same as it is our own, with just minor differences.  In this particular universe, through some twist of fate, my wife and I get to the event exposition early.  While it is only nineteen seconds, we end up gaining about 30 spaces in the line.  That's enough to change our lives forever....

*****

It's hot.  It's humid.  The line is packed and barely moving.  After twenty minutes, we've just made it to the point where the line is starting to loop back on itself over and over.  There are at least two more loop backs that we can see coming, and very little shade.  A lot of the racers walking towards us are sweating; bitching about the heat and hoping that will be a whole lot cooler on Sunday.

We come to another halt and start talking to the four women ahead of us.  They don't seem to even notice the heat, but that's because they are from freaking "Hotlanta".  They actually like this weather.  Well, we live in Colorado, vacation in Cabo and in four short weeks, we are moving to Arizona; all dry climates.  Even a little humidity is torture.  From that perspective, moving to Arizona isn’t so bad, especially to a small town in the mountains.

The line starts to move again and a woman with shoulder length blonde hair approaches us. "Excuse me…. I couldn't help but overhear.  Did you say you are moving to Sedona?  That's where I live."

Wow! What a small world! Fortunately, the line stops again, leaving us standing opposite her.  We immediately start talking about our upcoming move, asking all sorts of questions about living in Sedona.  We’ve only been there once before but it immediately felt like a place that fits our lifestyle. With every answer she gives us, we get even more excited about what’s awaiting us.

Eventually, the line starts to move again.  We momentarily lose contact with her since she is a few spaces in front of us.  When we catch up at the next corner, we are eager to continue our conversation with the bubbly young woman from our future hometown.

My wife starts with introductions, “I’m Diana, by the way and this is my husband, Bruce.  It’s great to meet you, uh…”

“April!” She replies with a quick smile. “It’s wild meeting you here, and please excuse me if I mess up your names for a while.  Contrary to the general opinion on blondes, I am not a ditz, but I can’t seem to remember people’s names to save my life.”

Diana and I laugh. “That’s alright,” I reply, “I have the exact same problem.  It was a real pain in the ass at work until a friend gave me some tips. Basically, focus really hard on the person and then try to tie their name to someone or something you already know.  It’s a pain, but it works for me.”    

“Suuure it does… but what the hell, let me give it a shot.”  April starts openly staring at us and you can almost hear the wheels turning in her head until her face lights up.

“HOLY Crap!  It works!  It was so easy!  I like comic books and the two of you are freaking Batman and Wonder Woman!  You know, Bruce Wayne and Diana of Themyscira.  Hell, you even kind of look like them!”

We both start laughing. Diana gestures at her own chest, “Only if my boobs were twice as big and I had a tiara!”  

My answer is more practical, “Sure, if I had a few billion dollars, a cave and a cape, although...  I do kind of think of Diana as ‘Wonder Woman’ so that’s a good fit!”  I stare at April a moment before adding, “You know, if you had pigtails…” 

April cuts me off with a chuckle, “Yes, I know, I know.  I would look just like Harley Quinn.  I’ve even thought of dressing up as her for Halloween, but seriously, who needs another ditzy blond?”

I nod in agreement and decide to change the subject, “So anyway, tell us some more about our future hometown. How’s the hiking?”

We get in a few more minutes of discussion before the line starts to move again.  We make a slight jog around some tall bushes and when we look again, April is gone.  With her light blonde hair, we should have been able to spot her, but no luck.

"Damn!" Diana exclaims, "I really wanted to talk to her some more.  I can't believe we met someone from Sedona.  How crazy is that?"

"Pretty wild," I reply.  "Don't worry; I am sure we will run into her again.  It looks like we still have an hour in this line."

We look around one more time, but she is nowhere to be seen.  We go back to talking about our move, temporarily forgetting the heat and humidity.  Now that we have even a limited first-hand account of the area, it sounds like an even better place to live than we originally thought.

A couple of minutes later we hear, "Hi!  Miss me?"  Diana turns around and there's April, moving into line with us.

"I figured as long as I have to wait in line, it might as well be with people I can talk to.”, she says with a smile.  She then hands each of us a cold bottle of water.  "I just had to get some water first.  It is just too damn humid here."

We thank her profusely for the water and giving up her place in line just to talk to us about our new home.

"That's okay. I have ulterior motives..." she starts and then gestures at our shirts. "It looks like you've done at least one of these races before.  I was kind of hoping you might help me figure out what I need to do here today.  And… this is my first time to a Disney Park.  Any pointers you'd be willing to share would really be appreciated.  I'm here on a package deal.  I've got my hotel and a four day "Park Bouncer", but I really don't know what to do with it."

Diana almost chokes on her water laughing.  When she can finally speak, she explains that it is a "Park Hopper”, and we would be happy to give her some tips.  For the next hour that we are in line, the two women chatter away, talking about races, Disney, Sedona and anything else that comes to mind.  It's obvious that they have made an instant connection.  Not only do they have similar interests, but even a matching sense of humor.  The entire time we are in line, one of them is always laughing at something the other said.  On top of that, April has a very open personality and doesn't filter much, which I find kind of refreshing.  I can already sense that Diana has made a new friend and we will see a lot more of her once we move.

As the line slowly moves along, I take the opportunity to surreptitiously check out the woman who is monopolizing my wife.  Cute (for a blonde anyway), she's a couple of inches shorter than Diana and is wearing what looks like a tennis outfit.  She has a semi-athletic build, which I see a lot in women in their late thirties or early forties, who have discovered the workout.  I peg her in the ‘mid’ to ‘late’ thirty range, but I almost never get that right.  Her most striking feature is her skin, which is flawless.  I find it a little odd that she is here alone, but don't get a chance to ask about it, since it is nearly impossible to get a word in edgewise with the two of them.  It’s worse than being around my family at the holidays.

As we get close to the packet pick up area, we start talking more about the race.  April loves running (of course she would, she is as mental as my wife) and is slotted in the "C" corral.  That is where Diana would be if she wasn’t stuck with me.  I kind of hate running, which surprises April, but then I explain that it is something that we can do together; share the pain of training and the joy of finishing.  Besides, it’s a Disney race, which is in a class of its own.  We won’t do anything else.

"You guys are really lucky to have each other.  You know that don't you?" she asks us with a wistful expression on her face.  "Not many people have that".

We agree immediately; it does help to marry your best friend. 

We finally make it into the event center and go to pick up our packets together.  When we are done and standing at the exit, there is a momentary awkward silence.  April looks a little unsure of herself.  Even though we hadn't discussed it, it turns out that Diana and I both have the same idea… 

"So, April.... Bruce and I were planning on going through the Expo to pick up some swag.  If you care to come with us, we could do that and then we'd love to give you your very own guided tour of Disneyland, being that it's your first time and all that."

April perks up immediately and says, "I would love that!  In fact, I was trying to figure out a way to ask if you'd mind me tagging along, but I don't want to seem pushy or interfere with your vacation."

"How about this...." I suggest, "We show you around Disneyland now, you return the favor to us once we move to Sedona?"

Diana smiles and quickly seconds my suggestion.

April unleashes a megawatt smile and says, "That would be wonderful!  There's a ton of things I'd love to show you, and there is just so much to do.  We'd have a blast!  So.... where is the Expo, and more importantly, where is a bathroom?  I have really got to pee!"

We both laugh.  It looks like she'll fit right in with us.

*****

The rest of the day was a lesson in amazing timing.  From the moment we entered the Expo everything just fell into place.  Later, we would tell April that it must have been beginners’ luck or Disney Magic at its best.  We are in and out of the Expo in about thirty minutes even though we later hear that the checkout lines lasted over two hours during parts of the day.  From there we went to the Grand Californian to drop off our bags.  Not only was our room ready, but it turned out that April was staying there as well.  When she booked her package, she had no idea what a great hotel or location she had chosen, she just thought the other two hotels would be packed with kids.

As good as the day started, it only got better.  When we stood inside the park and said "Let the magic begin….", the powers that be must have been listening.  The only FastPass we needed was for Indiana Jones; everything else was pretty much a walk on.  It wasn't that were no crowds, it was just amazing timing. 

Starting with Pirates, we hit all the major attractions on that side of the park and half of Fantasyland before dinner.  April had never been to this type of theme park before, so everything was new and exciting to her. We of course had to play it up, so when we took the first little drop at Pirates, she was screaming for real.  Haunted Mansion was "cute" and she loved Indiana Jones almost as much as Diana does.  Watching her experience each attraction for the first time was more fun for us than the rides themselves.  Because of that, she was somehow able to talk Diana (who hates rollercoasters) into going on big Thunder Mountain Railroad as well as Splash Mountain.  Wouldn't you know April took the front and stayed bone dry, where I was in the third position and got drenched?  At least it cooled me off some.

In addition to all the big thrill rides, she wanted to try everything in Fantasyland.  She dragged me on to Dumbo with her, which nearly did me in.  Rollercoasters?  No problem.  Spinning rides?  Shoot me now.  She laughed and called me a wimp until she did the Tea Cups on her own.  She came off that looking green around the gills.  Yeah, who's the wimp now?

After all that, we took a break for dinner before fireworks.  As we are talking, we found out that she works as a physical therapist specializing in Sports Medicine.  She provides services for various colleges and medical centers in Yavapai County.  Occasionally, she even works out of Cottonwood or Flagstaff.  She thought that was a pretty sweet gig until we tell her that we both will be working out of our home.

"Hmmm.  Aren't you afraid of spending too much time together?"

We admit that the thought had crossed our minds on occasion, but generally speaking, we aren't worried about it.  We just need to find things to do in town other than being in the house all day.

"Well, that's not a problem, is it...?” She asks as she links arms with Diana and starts skipping away and laughing, "... because I am sure I can keep her plenty busy all on my own."

We spend some time exploring Main Street and then pick out a place to watch fireworks.  I finally get to drag my wife away from April and hold her in my arms while the sky lights up in perfect sync to the “Wishes” soundtrack.  For Diana and I, the show was good as always; for someone who hadn't seen them before?  They were magical.  On top of that, April loves to sing, so once Diana started, she joined in and the two of them kept it up the entire time.

Once we figured out that April loves music, we decided to head into Tomorrowland, timing it so we could do a couple of rides and the watch the 80z All Stars.  We had seen them before and they are pretty good, covering a lot of popular songs.  We also snagged FastPasses for April and me to ride Space Mountain before heading to one of our favorite attractions, Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin.  When April sees the signs about a spinning ride, she starts to get worried.  After her experience with the Tea Cups, will it make her sick?  Diana bursts out laughing and explains how the ride works; basically, if Diana can ride it, anyone can.

When we get near the front of the line, I suggest the two women ride together.  I want a chance to test out a new scoring idea I have - without fighting for control of the buggy.  At first April declines, not wanting to "intrude" on our competition, but I insist, telling her that it is always fun to show a "newbie" the ropes and that “Di” and I will have plenty of opportunities to compete.  Diana is quick to agree, promising to show her all the best targets.  As I watch the two of them climb in the buggy ahead of me, I think of how lucky we were to meet her. It's obvious that the two of them are quickly becoming great friends.

When the ride ends, I am happy to see my score is way better than normal, although part of that might have been due to the "wheelchair stop" along the way.  Unfortunately, when I see the smirk on Diana’s face, I can tell that she probably did even better.  I decide to ignore that and ask April how she liked the ride. 

"It was a blast!  I didn't come close to getting sick and I thought I did really well, at least until I saw Diana's score."

"Really...." I ask, looking at Diana. ".... and how did you do?"

She starts smirking and hold up a single finger, wagging it back and forth.

"No way!  You broke a Million?!!!"

She doesn’t answer, but just starts doing "the happy dance" as we walk into the picture area.  Sure enough, there it is on the monitor.  1,006,900!!!  I decide that is a picture we need to have.  As we add it to our PhotoPass, I look at it again and notice something new.  While Diana is intently focused on blasting targets, April was focused just as intently, but it wasn't the targets she was paying attention to.